FOR YOUR EYES ONLY. THANK YOU.
Sandy Bleed asked me to help him and Faraway (his roommate) move about a week ago and initially I said no, because when I needed to move in August he refused to help me. He then had Faraway call me a couple of times to try and plead their case, basically thinking that he would take advantage of my baser urges to get me to come and help him. Faraway is a pretty cute blonde, 5′4” and 110 pounds. She has a great body and a fairly sharp wit (enough to make her a bitch sometimes).
As you know, Sandy has had a crush for several years on Faraway and has unsuccessfully pursued her with his very subtle/passive aggressive methods. He is one of those guys who follows women like puppy dogs without ever working up the courage to make a move. Sandy ‘knew’ that I had no chance with her, which is why he used her as bait to try to get my help.
I realized that he was being a bit of a dumb ass about it, but I am not the type to hold petty grudges, so I told him that I would help out… and I kind of wanted to beat him at his own game. Of course, I drew it out a little bit first… I didn’t pick up Faraway’s calls at first and when I finally did talk to her we ended up chatting for over an hour and laid a little foundation work.
On the day of the move, I showed up at their house and Sandy had not done any packing (though I don’t really either lol), so we started tossing his stuff in boxes. Faraway had all of her stuff ready, so moving her was quick. Sandy had decided to buy all of his new furniture before he moved, so I had to move 3 tables, 8 chairs, 2 couches, 1 love seat 3 dressers, 6 bookcases and a million little things. When we finished, I was pretty tired, but I took them up on the dinner they offered me. We went to a really good Haitian place called Waid’s in the Central District- I highly recommend it, it’s reasonably priced and very tasty. Anyways, while we were there, Faraway started flirting with me and Sandy started getting awkward about it. Sandy acting awkward about Faraway’s flirting made Heather (Sandy’s 35 year old hideous hookup) very uncomfortable and awkward too. Off topic- Heather actually came up to me at the beginning of the move and whispered in my ear that she had used to think I was a meathead asshole, but then she read my blog and it made an impression on her enough to think that I was a good guy lol.
I had a few beers there and Faraway had one and a glass of champagne. I wanted to go out to bar hopping, but Sandy and Heather had to return the U-Haul, get some stuff from Sandy’s work and bring one last carload of food home, so they dropped Faraway and I back off at Sandy’s place. At this point, I turned to Faraway and told her, “Are you going to give me booze and hang out or should I move on to the next destination?” She replied, “Come in. Do I really have to give you booze to get you to stay?” “Not necessarily, what else do you have to offer me?” She ignored that last comment and had me come in. We opened a bottle of wine (turned out later to be Sandy’s, but it’s not like he drinks them). We sat on the couch and talked for about two or three hours and drank. We flirted most of the night and had some pretty entertaining conversation, until out of the blue she said she wasn’t going to kiss me. I just looked at her with a strange, shocked expression and said, “wow… you are awful. I have been hanging out with you for three hours and you think I’m just trying to hook up with you? Are we in junior high? I’m going to to go to the bathroom.” I stood up to go and she started apologizing and said, “Sandy told me that you were a horrible meathead and all you wanted to do was have sex with me.” My usually sleepy eyelids opened a good amount on hearing this admission.
Faraway ended up telling me that Sandy has been disparaging me to her (in his attempt to keep her from sleeping with me). I thought this was kind of fucked up. I had gone over to his house about a month ago to play chess and she was there and we had some friendly flirting. Sandy had really freaked out about this and said some pretty rude things, then didn’t invite me over for chess for quite some time. Evidently after I had left that night, he had asked her to promise never ever to sleep with me. What a guy…. I explained to her that he said those bad things about me because he still was trying to hook up with her. She said that he had given up long ago and they were just friends now.
Anyways, I kept hanging out with Faraway and Sandy finally got home with Heather after midnight. I think that I have very rarely seen a more passive aggressive display then what followed. Sandy kept coming downstairs or sending Heather down on little meaningless errands and they kept making pointed, awkward comments. Faraway finally turned to me and said, “Wow, you were right about Sandy. I’m kind of pissed about this.” They kept doing it for awhile more, then went upstairs to have sex and commiserate about their miseries; Sandy about Faraway, Heather about Sandy wanting Faraway lol.
Faraway and I ended up cuddled up on the couch and she slept laying on my chess till around 4am when I decided I wanted to go home. She kept begging me to stay just a while longer, which I did at first, but she kept trying to convince me to stay and finally I broke away. When I left, she said, “You’re such a sweet man… I really want you to stay with me, please stay.”
Moral of the story: Don’t say shit about person A to person B, then try to use person B to manipulate person A to do your bidding…. it could backfire in a big way. Especially when person A is a brilliant and gorgeous stud.
Faraway told me that she was going to tell Sandy when she got up today that she fucked me and came three times and that I was the hottest shit since sliced bread lol.
I plan on calling her tomorrow or the next day and getting together again. If she’s lucky, she may get to do more than just kiss and snuggle with me. And Sandy may get a video tape of it.
